If you’d told me that my dad’s job as an HR director would involve more “listening” than “policy-making” before having the privilege of actually understanding and even taking part in the famous HR tête-à-tête between my parents, I likely would’ve given you a skeptical glance, nodded in agreement to make you think you were right, all while quietly thinking you were totally exaggerating and that it was rather far-fetched.
Now that I’m starting to grasp the world of business with all its different facades; the employee complaints, corporate wellness programs, and the occasional “workplace drama” that I have to endure sipping a good cup of mint tea don’t sound so foreign anymore. My family’s daily tea time is the rush hour of “Tell me all about your day”s, and getting to hear my father’s turn time and time again has made me realize one thing: My dad’s professional turf may have become a kind of unofficial therapy office…minus the couch, of course.
In most books or movies, HR is portrayed as the “bad cop” who’s only there to catch you breaking company rules. But as someone who’s seen the behind-the-scenes action in HR, I can tell you this: HR has definitely evolved. My dad isn’t just the guy who hires and fires or enforces this or that policy; he’s now the go-to person for everyone’s emotional drama, interpersonal conflicts, and struggles at work.
In fact, according to a 2022 report by Gallup, employees are more likely to seek mental health support at work than they were just a decade ago with a staggering amount of 66% of workers reporting that they would be comfortable seeking mental health help from HR. Which makes it all the more accurate when HR leaders are referred to as “emotional gatekeepers.”
HR’s focus has slowly shifted toward “holistic” employee well-being—basically caring for the whole person, not just their work product. And for HR professionals like my dad, who’s been in the field for over 20 years, it’s clear that work-life balance isn’t just about taking time off—it’s about embracing the principles of modern organizational thinking, where the focus is on combining personal well-being and professional fulfillment, driven by the relatively recent shifts in workplace management from the OST (Organizational Science Theory) that suggest a more human-centered workplace.
According to Psychology Today, HR professionals now spend almost 20% of their time on employee “baby-sitting”. That’s a whole fifth of their workday. And while it’s amazing that HR is so invested in their teams’ emotional health, it does raise some eyebrows. Can they actually handle the weight of these conversations? Most HR directors aren’t trained in psychology or mental health, so while they’re great at resolving conflicts or managing benefits purely through “active listening” practice, are they really prepared to help employees through mental health crises?
But as one HR director, who also happens to be my dad, put it (or didn’t, he doesn’t like to admit it) he just cannot stop himself from helping; if there’s something he can do, he will do it. Usually without a grain of hesitation.
So, HR does what it has to do—become the emotional ear when employees need their matters tended to.
But where’s the line? When does a simple listening ear turn into needing professional counseling? Is it really within my father’s field of work to come home more frustrated than ever about not being able to succour after a 30 minute phone call of burdens released? Does the company pay him for a loaded heart carried home?
One Harvard Business Review article titled The Emotional Labor of HR further points that out by affirming that HR staff might be putting their own emotional well-being at risk when they take on these roles.
Times are changing, and there’s an increasing demand for organizations to care about their employees in ways that extend beyond paychecks and performance reviews.
Most companies aren’t offering professional therapy (as they should), but they’re trying to build a culture where employees feel supported. From “Call me anytime”s to team-building activities, HR is integrating wellness into the fabric of workplace culture.
In short, HR is turning into a hybrid role—part administrator, part emotional support system. And my dad? He’s just trying to juggle both, all while keeping his sanity intact, doing what he can to ensure employees feel valued, heard, and supported. Maybe HR should have a license for this if enterprises don’t take action to hire proper therapists—because the emotional labor really involved is no joke.